First off let me say I've enlarged this picture so that anyone who wants a clear mental image before they rub one out can do so. I'm trying to figure out who to blame for not informing me of this back in 2005. Jessica Biel is at the top of my list for celebrities who I would--well, you know... I think I would probably cry tears of joy if I saw her in the buff and if you don't have the same reaction it means you're either a woman or gay--you know what, I strike that last statement. This girl has got to have some crossover appeal if you ask me. My wife will say she's a slut, which to me means less effort on my part and that's not a bad thing at all. In the words of George Costanza, "I would give up red meat to see you naked."
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