J Love is a cock tease

I saw Jennifer Love Hewitt in a ProActiv commercial and damn her tits look good! Hasn't she been teasing us long enough with those push up bras and fake, forced smiles? You've got to figure that eventually she'll make one too many bad movies. Then it's time for her to bare all in a slutty Penthouse/Playboy pictorial. It's happened before: Tiffany and Debbie Gibson come to mind. Until then it's like we're laying siege to her french cut panties. Some booze and pills and I'm working my pile driving ass on this girl's cooter in no time!

Britney's back

Britney actually looks okay in the picture of her appearing at her second home--court. She looks like she's wearing her J-Lo costume. I'm not sure why people would buy her album, but I see a time in the near future where the blog title will read "Britney takes it in the back door for money" instead of what it says now.

I normally only write about celebs when they're fucking up but something in a cnn.com article got me going and here it is:

"'Still, Junior Sanchez of Los Angeles, a 21-year-old college student, says the singer's woes make him "feel more attached to her."

'I can really tell she's going through a lot of bad stuff right now,' he says. 'Her real fans don't care about her personal life. We care about her music and the way she performs.'"

For those of you wondering, Junior Sanchez is gay, a transvestite or at some stage of having his dick whacked and formed into a poontang. "Feel more attached to her"? What the fuck is that? If straight guys are hanging out and one of them says this shit it's legally okay to beat him senseless.

What the fuck?!

I'm a die hard Auburn fan and I bleed orange and blue. I love Auburn so much I have a tattoo to prove it. Tonight we went into Baton Rouge and played our asses off. Brian Cox, Brad Lester, and Rod Smith were money on the drive to go up 24-23. But how we don't kick it deep is a mystery to me. Those players laid everything out and a shitty decision by the coaching staff cost us a win. I don't care that other things could've happened and they still may have scored. To not put in your rested defense that had to be pumped up is a travesty. And then to not challenge what was an obvious spot was ridiculous. And to not use your two timeouts on the final drive to save time for a possible comeback drives me crazy. I like Tuberville a lot--I think he's a good coach, but what he did tonight is awful. They should lock Tuberville in the press room until he admits to screwing the team out of a win. Coaches will always put the blame on themselves even when it is unwarranted, but the blame sits squarely on them and nobody else here.

Anybody see a resemblance?

Hillary Duff certainly looks like she's got some talent, but something about her seems off. She's got that tiny little body and that big head. She looks like a nutcracker...

Ball players suspended for androgenous names

Stanford suspends center indefinitely

You can read the story if you'd like, but that's not why I'm posting this. These two guys, who look like Ricky Martin light (if you're a guy that's not a compliment) must have the WORST first names in the history of men. I bet their parents are two lesbians because there's no reason to call your kids Robin and Brook. These guys look like some serious pussies, too. They're not going to get rough in the paint unless you give them enough money or roofies.

Qjkl;djaipjio

If you're reading this before looking at the lovely lady's bountiful jubblies then you're a homo...

Atlanta has a new franchise!

Pop quiz: what do you get when you take a shitty sport and a shitty sports town? A WNBA expansion team! The opportunity for an expansion franchise popped up because no one gave a rat's ass about the Charlotte team and it folded in '06. So what better way of losing money than moving a team to Atlanta, which is quite possible THE WORST sports town in America. If you're running from the police and need to find some place where nobody will look--go to Philips Arena during an Atlanta Hawks game. The Hawks have one of the worst attendance records among NBA teams. They don't give a shit about the Falcons and you could buy first-round playoff tickets to Braves games on the day of the game. Atlanta's a great town otherwise, but if you need to lose money fast so your wife doesn't get it in the divorce invest in a WNBA team.

You could have WNBA players play naked and nobody would show up unless you like women who might have a penis. Nothing but a bunch of nappy-headed hoes playing in the league. Wait a minute. Was that racist? No--I hate all women equally (except my wife of course).